🎄 The Holidays Are Coming… Everyone Remain Calm

If you’ve ever found yourself screaming “SMILE!” at your family during the annual Christmas card photo while simultaneously questioning every life choice you’ve ever made… welcome, friend. You are one of us.

And this week on the Middle Age Management podcast, Bryan and I dove straight into the belly of the holiday beast — expectations, childhood scars, the obsession with “magic,” and why the Joneses are absolutely faking it.

🎁 Why Do Holidays Bring Out Everything?

Say the word holidays and half of us get hives. Not because we don’t love our families — we do — but because this season is an emotional pressure cooker.Childhood memories show up.Unspoken expectations show up. Budget stress shows up. And your mother’s voice magically reappears in your head reminding you that “nice families send Christmas cards.”

It’s a lot. Especially when you’re the default parent, the planner, the peacekeeper, and the one holding everyone’s feelings together with garland and caffeine.

📸 The Christmas Card Wars

We told the story on the show — the classic “24-roll film disaster” from Bryan’s childhood. His mom was determined to get one good holiday photo. His brother was determined to ruin all 24. And honestly? Peak holiday energy.

The real kicker? We repeated history. Our own perfectly staged family photo shoots have brought out the worst in all of us. The forced smiles. The coordinated outfits. The dog who suddenly forgets basic commands. Me, threatening to cancel Christmas while Bryan mutters about “music superior to Christmas music.”

Every family has their version. And if someone sends you a perfect photo? Just know it took 15 minutes of hell and one person crying in a car.

🌲 The Joy Is Always in the “Unplanned”

Here’s what we’re finally getting right in midlife:The traditions that matter aren’t the ones that look good — they’re the ones that feel good.

Like:Hot cocoa and Elf. Ordering takeout on Thanksgiving. Walking together instead of forcing a “magical” moment.Letting your teen pick the Christmas card outfits and realizing halfway through the shoot they finally understand why you’ve been screaming about this for 15 years.

The real joy always shows up in the unplanned, the unscripted, the “oh my god, this is actually fun” moments.

Not the tablescape.Not the matching pajamas. Not the 19-item-per-kid Amazon haul we all regret in January.

Just connection.That’s it.That’s the whole deal.

The Secret to Better Holidays?

Ask everyone:“What makes it feel like the holidays for YOU?”

Then actually listen.

Kids always surprise us — their lists are simpler than we think. (And much cheaper. Bless them.)Partners surprise us. We surprise ourselves.

When you drop the pressure and talk honestly, the whole season gets lighter. More real. More fun. More… human.

Which is basically the thesis of midlife, isn’t it? Stop performing and start living.

Want the Full Holiday Breakdown?

This episode is full of stories, laughter, and the kind of honesty that reminds you you’re not the only one losing your mind over Christmas cards. Or feeling nostalgic. Or overwhelmed. Or secretly relieved the kids don’t like turkey.

Listen to the full episode of Middle Age Management on Apple Podcasts. HERE You’ll laugh, you’ll nod, you might feel emotionally seen in a way you weren’t prepared for — but in the best way.

Happy almost-holidays, friend.

We’re all doing our best. And honestly? That’s more than enough.

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

Caring for aging parents while holding up the rest of your life can feel overwhelming. But here’s the truth—you don’t have to carry it all by yourself.

I’m here to walk alongside you. Whether you’re just beginning to notice changes or you’re already in the thick of hard decisions, there’s support for every stage of the journey.

Here’s how I can help:

✨ 1-on-1 Guidance Sessions + Care Chats At TheSandwichedGen.com, we’ll talk it through, create a clear plan, and take weight off your shoulders.

📘 My eBook: When Roles ReverseYour step-by-step roadmap for caring for aging parents with less stress and more confidence. Inside, you’ll learn how to:

• Recognize when and how to step in

• Start the tough conversations (without constant conflict)

• Balance independence with safety

• Avoid the chaos of last-minute decisions

👉 Grab your copy here.

📲 Follow along on Instagram @BarbaraStratteI share daily encouragement, practical tools, and the kind of real-life truths you won’t find in a medical pamphlet.

Big Hugs and the world is better because you are in it,

Barbara

Because this path is heavy—but it feels a lot lighter when you don’t walk it alone.

#SandwichedGeneration #DementiaSupport #CaringForParents #AgingWell #WhenRolesReverse #MemoryMatters